Hiding In The Bathroom

My friend Super-G and I went to a fun event last night in Cambridge – it was the book launch for the hilarious new title, Hiding in the Bathroom: An Introvert’s Roadmap to Getting Out There When You’d Rather Stay Home.  I’m not even sure how I got on the invite list, but when it landed in my inbox, I forwarded it to Super-G in a nanosecond because we talk about this all the time.

We are both introverts who fake extroversion in pursuance of our callings. That’s a bit of an exaggeration, but not much. I love deep conversations with people, and I love public speaking. But the middle ground? That thing where people meet and make small talk about weather and jobs and how you both ended up in the same place? I’m so bad at that it’s almost funny. If you visit our church and have the misfortune to encounter me first, I’ll ask the two questions on the top of my head (Where are you from?  What brings you to Cambridge?) and then go completely blank. If you toss a softball across the plate like, “I”m here for grad school…” I can usually ask, “Where?” But after that I’m lost. It’s like the possibilities branch off in too many directions (What are you studying? How did you pick this school? What do you hope to do? What’s your dream for your life?)  and I don’t know which one to follow. It’s not that I don’t care. It’s the opposite of that. I want to know what matters to you and what God is doing in your life, and all these questions fill my mind and merge to create a blank wall. And so, to fill the awkward silence I blurt, “Well, okay then! There’s coffee in the hotel lobby and we have a bunch of free books over on the counter there you can check out. Make yourself at home!” and then scurry away.

(And this, friends, is why we have to come up with some title other than Pastor to describe what I do. )

I’m fine once our service gets started. My role in our church gathering is to give a talk to help people connect with what God is doing in their lives and think about how to respond, and to lead us in remembering that prayer works in ways we don’t understand, and is worth the effort.  I LOVE THIS SO MUCH I can’t even tell you. And afterwards, when I get to talk with you about real things? That is super fun. But if you visit our church and arrive early, all I’ve got is directions to the free books and coffee.

We’ll see if this book helps me raise my game :)

Speaking of raising my game, I haven’t done a Stitch Fix update in awhile. One arrived yesterday, so I’ll share that, too.

I still love it. I’m still amazed that an algorithm named Katelyn can pick clothes that look good on me that I would never in a million years try on my own. The jeans alone have changed my entire emotional response to getting dressed in the morning.

(I’ll be honest and say that Steve has has the exact opposite experience – Stitch Fix sent him skinny jeans, and I have never laughed so hard as I did the night he stood there squeezed into dark hipster denim, exclaiming, “Even the calves are tight! Who wears jeans that hurt your calves???” After which #2 Cherub observed, “I’m not sure Dad wants a new style… I think he likes the style he has!” Truth.)

Over the past few months, I’ve gotten a bunch of Fixes. I usually keep one or two things out of the five they send. There have been a couple of busts (I’m looking at you, Day-Glo Orange Polyester Blouse!) and some big hits (Oh, the joy of jeans and assorted tops to wear them with!) I now own leopard print flats, which no one saw coming. Overall, it’s been great. Given the introversion I describe above, it’s nice to head out into the world of awkward small talk liking what I wear.

Here’s what came yesterday:

I’m keeping the green athleisure top and the grey sweatshirt – it has cozy soft sleeves that feel like a hug. (Apparently, I’m preparing to hibernate.) The rest is going back – the color of the jacket is a too orange for me. The pockets on the jeans fall below my butt, turning my backside into a strange architectural cantilever situation (not the look I’m going for). And while the blouse is pretty, when I tried it on, I didn’t want to wear it to the book event that night, which told me all I needed to know.

All to say, I’m surprised by how investing in a couple of pieces a month has brought peace and even joy back into my getting dressed each day, without any pressure to buy things I don’t like.  If this sounds like something that could bring joy to your world, here’s my referral link. I get a one-time $25 credit for any friends who order a Fix via that link.  It’s made some nice jeans possible, and I appreciate it!

As for the “fix” for my introvert tendencies, I’m hoping to have some new tips to try on Sunday. If you’re in the area, stop by and see if I can hold a conversation that lasts more than 42 seconds! ;)

One thought on “Hiding In The Bathroom

  1. Lady of the Seasonal Pond says:

    I totally get the whole “hide in the bathroom” thing. I’m sure that at some more boisterous events, people begin to think I have a medical condition or something. Oddly, like you, I excel at some extroverted things. One of my responsibilities is to call new members of the Y and talk to them about their experience. I have the best numbers of anyone in our facility for that. But then, I get to figure out the family based on what they’ve already signed up for and have words prepared before I call. Being able to plan ahead is the difference, I think. Also, I’m separated by the phone line from them. It’s the off-the-cuff stuff I suck at.

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